Title: Stepping Heavenward
Background Information: See first post entitled "Stepping Heavenward"
Stepping Heavenward...
As mentioned in my first post, the book starts out with Katy saying "How dreadfully old I am getting! Sixteen!" Her first diary entry begins January 15, 1831. She discusses how she was going to get up early, but it seemed so cold and felt so warm in bed, she stayed in bed and "made ever so many good resolutions." She wants to begin her journal--she has done several in the past, but always got tired of them. She resolves to please her mother, be more self-denying and thinks how everyone will be surprised to see her improved. :-) However, she takes so long thinking about this, that it causes her to stay in bed a little too long, and she has to rush around to get ready for the day. She is then late for breakfast and prayers. Her mother makes a point of mentioning her tardiness, causing Katy to "flare up." In a hurry to get to school she insists that she doesn't need her overshoes (a bigger shoe/boot like thing that is worn over regular shoes to protect from the cold or wet weather)
Katy has a good day at school and gets a present from her friend Amelia. The gift is a hair net and Katy writes--"Nets are just coming into fashion." She is excited to get one because it will save her time and she won't have to comb her hair--just twist and squeeze and be done. :-)
When she gets home her mother has, what I would call a "discussion" with her. Her mother tells Katy of her faults and that her character will be "essentially formed" by the time she is 20. Katy's shocked to think she has only four years to improve herself. Her mother also says--"I hope you really are a child of God, and are trying to please Him. And it is my daily prayer that you may become a lovely, loving, useful woman." (p.3)
The discussion goes on longer and Katy leaves upset and angry with the whole conversation.
When she gets to her room she sees a note and a Bible from her mother, on her desk. In the note her mother asks her to read "A few verses, to carefully read and ponder, instead of a chapter or two for mere form's sake" (p.4). Katy then randomly opens her Bible up to Matthew 24:42--"Watch, therefore, for you do not know what hour your Lord is coming." Katy writes--"I felt a real repugnance to be always on the watch, thinking I might die at any moment. I am sure I am not fit to die. Besides I want to have a good time, with nothing to worry me. I hope I shall live ever so long. Perhaps in the course of forty or fifty years I may get tired of this world and want to leave it. And I hope by that time I shall be a great deal better than I am now, and fit to go to heaven" (p. 4).
Katy then writes a note to her mother and goes down to dinner, she spends the rest of her evening enjoyably and her friend Amelia is at dinner too.
Katy's writing in her diary is somewhat sporadic and several days later she writes and mentions a cold she has. (due to the fact that she didn't wear her overshoes...)
She is sick for awhile and says--"I do wonder if I shall ever really learn that Mother knows more than I do!" (p 6)
In February she writes how she feels out of sorts and that she prays to God to "make me better, and why doesn't He?" Later her health returns and she feels grateful that God has made her well, and wishes that she loved Him better.
Katy writes for awhile about a variety of things, her interests--which involve reading, drawing, singing, and playing the piano. She watches her mother help a neighbor with a sick child--sadly the child dies. She records arguments with her mother and brother.
In May she writes how she is going to practice self-denial by sharing her friend Amelia with a classmate. This goes over well with Amelia and Katy ends up getting jealous.
She has a discussion about it with her mother and her mother tries to make her see how God is willing to help her. Katy's mother also says--"I do wish I could make you love to pray, my darling child" (p 12). Katy records how she finds praying to be hard work and wishes there was an easier way of "growing good" she also wishes that God would send her a sweet temper, like he sent bread and meat to Elijah. She writes--"I don't believe Elijah had to kneel down and pray for them like I do" (p 12).
More to follow in another post!
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